Married for 53 years, I missed out on Tinder, Match.com, break-up texts, electronic background checks and incidents like the following story (which I swear is true).
It was a long hard winter in Chicago. A brutal month of sub-zero temperatures was followed by a mind-numbing month of never-ending snow storms.
So, Melissa, a 50ish single woman, got a little bored and decided to place an ad on Craigslist under the heading: “Shoe Shopping/Foot Massage.” She also took the precaution of creating an email account using a fictitious name.
She got 50 responses.
Weeding out the haters, the crazies and the scary, she landed on one that sounded like your Average-Joe-fetishist-next-door.
They arranged to meet at a coffee house, conveniently located across the street from a shoe store.
But before Average Joe was willing to take out the credit card, he naturally wanted to see what he was buying. He was not disappointed when Melissa removed her shoes and revealed her newly pedicured feet in all their glory.
“Beautiful,” he said.
Shopping took very little time, as Melissa had pre-selected a $150 pair of Dansko shoes. Then it was on to the massage, which never got any kinkier than a little toe sucking and nose probing.
Melissa reports that she’s thrilled with her shoes, which are stylish, comfortable and go with everything.
Apparently, Joe is happy as well. He recently texted to ask if she wanted to go shopping again.
“Let’s wait,” she replied, “until the new summer styles are out.”
Got another example of “Dating in the 21st Century”? I’d love to hear about it. E-mail me at email@example.com. And pass this blog along to anyone who needs a laugh or a new pair of shoes.